Here I am, listening to Aphex Twin and Elliott Smith, drinking discount coke and having one of those life moments. Skipping through the pages of my life.. my childhood, people who have been influential in my life, moments of great impact, love lost and love found, moments of triumph, times of despair and pondering what may come of certain situations.
If someone had told me three months ago where I would be this exact moment, I wouldn't have believed them. I had such a nice evening yesterday, and regardless of what comes of it, it fills me with a sense of pride, relief and hope.
I have come to terms with the fact that we are all miniscule bleeps across the board, without real everlasting impressions. And despite this slightly somber recognition, I am still at ease. This is without a doubt, a nice feeling.
All I know is I am happy.
A weight has been lifted from my shoulders and the sunglasses have come off, hopefully for good. It's been a long time since I've felt this way. I feel capable, I feel intelligent, I feel informed, I feel beautiful, I feel at ease with myself, I feel as though I have the world at my feet.. I'm usually one of those people who become overwhelmed when looking too far ahead, but I presume the recent life-changes have altered my outlook, and for this, I am grateful.
I am excited not only for the weekend, but to see what life has in store for me this coming year and years ahead. As relentlessly cliche as I might sound, I can't help but think of this.. It's not the destination, it's the journey.